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How to be in control of your life? | How to control hormones rather than hormones controlling us?


Having a sense of control over your life creates a sense of satisfaction in your mind. It also helps in making correct moves, which in turn makes our future more secure.

I believe in the quote;

We should control our hormones, rather than hormones controlling us.

Being in control of your life doesn't mean losing all the randomness or surprises of life. Instead, it means always being aware of how you are doing, and redirecting yourself when you are heading in the wrong direction.

Below are some simple tips that you can use to have more control of your life, and master the art of success;

  1. Don't react by the act:
    In a random situation, where you feel upset, and start losing control of your behavior, quickly take some steps back, and count to 50. This is because you don't want to get angry and take decisions in a hurry. 

    You should be like a bottle of water, even if we shake it before opening it, it will never react and jump out, but when you do the same with a bottle of soda, the ingredients inside will start creating pressure when you shake it, and it will jump out of the bottle as soon as you open it.
  2. Check what needs to be done:
    Check for all the avenues. Don't get distracted by details or by your emotional reaction. Think of what needs to be done and sketch an immediate plan of action. This process will help you feel in control and capable of facing the situation. 
  3. Lead others with an example:
    When you lead by example, people are more likely to follow you. When something needs to be planned, or when immediate action is needed, step up. Think of the things that you can immediately control. For example, if you are planning for an outdoor event, you can't control the weather, but you can control the time and location.

    Also, taking initiative will make you feel like you are in control, as you knew what the situation demanded, and how you are tackling it.

    When you see others are also coming by looking at you, start delegating the tasks that they are capable to handle. 
  4. Create a blog or diary:
    I cannot stress enough the importance of this point. This is because it's our emotions that make us feel good or bad about ourselves.

    Get into the habit of writing your thoughts and feelings in a journal or on a blog. You can analyze what is leading to what feeling, and you can also make a log to keep track of triggers. Knowing what your triggers are for specific emotions, then you can do things to limit or avoid your triggers.

    On the other hand, because you write your feelings and emotions down, this will help you get rid of any stress-related diseases like insomnia, hypertension, etc.
  5. List down your issues and name them:
    This is an awesome way to deal with the issue that you are facing on a day-to-day basis. For example, if you have insecurities, painful memories, or angry responses that come to you frequently, it might help to list them down and give them a name. 

    For instance, when someone cuts you when you are talking, and you feel angry, say ALIENS. When the feeling or thought is triggered, greet it by name. "Oh, it's the ALIENS feeling" again.

    This will help you take some distance and prevent the bad though from taking over. You can also use these naming conventions in your blog or journals to make it more entertaining, and you will also not think much while jotting down your experiences.
  6. Let go of anger, grudges, and resentment:
    Forgiveness is not for others, but yourself.

    This is true because when you are angry, you are basically holding on to grudges and resentments that start weighing you down. Forgive those who have wronged you. Forgiveness can lead to empathy and compassion for those who have hurt you. This will help you calm down and feel in control.
  7. Set your goals:
    This is important, because "if you won't stand up for something, you will fall for anything". Think of things you would like to accomplish, things that would fix your problems or give you greater success.

    Think of how you can achieve each goal, and how much time each will take. Ensure that you are taking small steps in achieving your larger goals. For example, if your dream is to buy yourself a house, break it down into smaller steps, like getting a good-paying job, and then saving for the down payment, etc.

    This will make achieving your goal much easier, as you are focusing on the small milestones, while you get closer to your goal. 

    You can also go over the list of things that make you feel out of control. For everything that is truly bothering you, make a goal to fix it.
  8. Set boundaries with others:
    You should know when to draw boundaries with others. People may come and they may go, but it is you who have to live with yourself. Therefore, it is good to have some boundaries, and some alone time with yourself. Even mutually supportive relationships need good boundaries.
  9. Know your limits, because takers have none:
    Are you usually drained, because someone is asking for one thing or else from you?

    Well, you seem to be a giver. One has rightly said, "Givers should know their limits because takers have none".

    This is so true, when someone manipulates you and asks for favors, you are the one whose energy gets drained. Not only energy but financially as well. Therefore, you should be clear about what you can help with and what not.

    This will make you feel more in control.

    For example, if someone asks you for money, as he or she might be struggling from some financial crisis, you should respond by saying that, "I can buy you groceries if you have none, but I can't give you that money. These are against my principles".

    The reason for this is that you should give and not expect it to be returned, this is how bad debts should be dealt with. When you buy your friend or the needy person some groceries, he or she might not be able to pay you back, but you don't care about it now, as you haven't paid any money, and this will also not harm your relationship with that person.
  10. Take care of your physical health:
    Sleep around eight hours a night, eat at least three meals a day, and get some exercise every day. If you aren't taking care of your body, you can't be in control of your life.

    Having a good routine may help you get rid of the lazy feeling that you may have. Therefore, always start your day by making your bed and then drinking a bottle of water.

    After you had your water, go and freshen up, and then go for exercise. You may opt for a gym or just go for a walk. This will ensure that you are completing all your tasks, and this is the key to keeping yourself and your life in control.

Having control of your life is not difficult, you should know what you want to do and how you want to spend it.

Also, when you take steps in taking your life in control, there will be several roadblocks that you may encounter, but you should ensure that you work hard to overcome those and be consistent in what you are doing.

When you feel like giving up, just remember why you started it.

This is because life will always seem to be unfair, but this is you who will have to gather all the courage and set your emotions aside to work on your goals.


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